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Day 4 or 60: Psyching myself up

Today I only had two juices: Pineapple orange in the morning and apple-beet in the afternoon. I was going to make something for dinner, something involving cabbage, but I couldn't bring myself to get up and do it. Something just seems wrong about juicing cabbage. Bad move on my part. I had water and hunger all evening, to the point of walking past the fridge, fresh food I purchased last night and yelling at it. NO I DO NOT WANT TO MAKE A PB&J! Then when I finialy wanted my dinner juice, it was too late. And now I am up writing at almost midnight, and could have had that late dinner juice, but instead I will go hungry. Not good.

So I adjourned upstairs, where there is no food. It is not that I usually have this hard of a time with temptation, it is the mind games, man. I am better now, but whoa! I felt the challenge tonight, for sure. Now, writing, I can reflect, tell myself that it was only because I was an idiot and didn't have dinner. I am juice fasting, not starving myself. Sheesh!

Speaking of which, I watched this independent film tonight called Disfigured, it was about these two women, one very fat, one a recovering (or not) anorexic. For the sake of this blog I will refer to them as the thick one and the thin one. The thin one wanted to join this "Fat Acceptance" group that the thick one belonged to, and all the other women looked at the thin one like she was out of her mind, making fun of them just by her wanting to join because she saw herself as "fat". It was interesting because the thick one eventually became friends with the thin one, in a really messed up set of friendship attempts, they bonded over the way people always obsess about their eating (or lack of) habits. I rated it 3 out of 5, but that was because it was a bit twisted at times.

Oh, and by the way...beets turn lots of stuff red...don't be alarmed if you start fasting and lots of stuff is red...

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I filmed a bit this morning, but the sound is off. I will post it here anyway.

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