To combat the icky mouth, I decided today would be a water day. I was going to do a green juice, but I felt pretty good all day on just water and a cup of tea, so I said to hell with juice. I will get back to it tomorrow. So it was water with lime, Yogi brand Healthy Fasting tea with orange for lunch, and water with lemon and lime later. I didn't have any bags so I took the half orange and half lemon and put them cut side to cut side and rubber banded them together and left them on my desk. My boss comes by and starts laughing at them, asking if I was attempting some kind of cross-citrus breeding program. It was funny, you had to be there I guess.
How am I feeling?
I have gotten this question a lot since I started, and upon reflection today, I can say this is not half as bad as I thought it would be. Today I have the budding of an idea: There is a difference between hunger, craving, temptation, and Hunger. I have not gotten to the point only after 8 days where I am some yogi guru on juice fasting, but this is the thinking juice fast blog, and here I am thinking on "paper." So here goes:
hunger - small "h", is something you feel when you miss a meal, or when your brain is working in conjunction with your stomach, listening for even the smallest rumble as a sign that you need more food now. You maybe missed lunch and your stomach protests and you want a good dinner to compensate. That hunger ain't shit. Now, I did not really know that in my bones before. I think I always told myself I needed 3 square meals, the food pyramid, all my servings of fruits and veggies yadda yadda yadda, surely a product of years of hearing about all that stuff from the government and the industrial farming industry. Think about it, the dairy farmers and their happy cows want us to eat cheese and other dairy products, the sugar industry wants us to believe that "real sugar" is the best sugar, beef producers want us to eat certified Angus beef, and what I think the biggest joke of late is the corn producers telling us that high fructose corn syrup in that gallon jug of Brand X fruit drink is good for us. Whatever!
cravings - I am not sure if it is mostly a bi-product of commercials/marketing, smelling food and the sensory memory attached to those smells, or a some emotional fall back, but in 8 days I have learned a bit more about what cravings really are in my body. When you are taking hunger out of the equation, meaning you ignore the angry stomach and the grumbles of your digestive track, you mind starts going through its store of triggers to try to get you to eat. It says "well, that direct approach of logic didn't work, let's go 'round and be a bit sneeky." When you catch yourself it is kind of funny, I imagine shaking a finger at my own mind.
Temptaion - another beast for me. When something looks/smells/sounds/feels (you see the sensory pattern here) like it will be really good, I could want it, even without an audible hunger sound. My stomach may be quiet and just chilling, thinking it lost its battle for now and is almost complacent, but the mind won't give up. It is really juvinile really. This weekend the sight of the Wonder bread and the softness of the package made me want it. I would never want Wonder bread on a usual day. But the mind flashes images of childhood and the security of mom, and tempts you into having some.
Hunger - capital H. This Hunger is more forceful and real, it seems. After a few days, my stomach stopped rumbling, my mind gave up its onslaught of tricks, and I was very still. Then every now and again I would feel Hunger in my whole gut, like the organ itself was shrinking in its emptiness. I had water. If the Hunger came back soon after, I had juice. Then the Hunger quieted down and all was good. Now, for the first time in a long time, it felt like I was listening to my body, really listening. Hunger for real is what starving people have, and they try to fill their bellies with water or mud cakes. For me, Hunger in this form is mild because I have food, or juice as it were. I know when my next meal is and the pain of true Hunger is absent.
All during these points I can say that it is the strength of will power, that same strength I said I didn't have all these years, it is that seed of sheer will that got me though. In 8 days I have fostered that will into being able to have only water for a whole day and not have that big Hunger. Wow. It feels great. I have to say I feel good. My energy has been bolstered.
I am going to finish this night with a bit of coconut water while I watch LOST, in comradery for those islanders. LOL. ;)