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Day 15: Sweet and Sore.

I am black and blue today. Ah well. I feel it. I can only imagine what a high speed fall off my bike would be!  Anyway, I am happy to report that I am 15 days in and feeling good otherwise.

I had to work from home today, because I am so sore I didn't want to get up. I am just now (at 3pm) having my first juice. I had some water in the morning, but was not hungry. I know I should have had something sooner, but I was having a juice procrastination. I am not sure why that is. Maybe it is the removal of my normal routine and the addition of the sore muscles. Well, when I got around to it, I cut myself a very ripe pineapple--so heavy and sweet and yellow--and a 1/4 of a mini watermelon. I juiced it with the rind with a 1/4 of the pineapple. It is not too sweet (because of the rind) but it is delicious. It is a beautiful shade of pink.

I want to say that I really appreciate the support. It is great not hearing naysayers and negativity.  Going into this, I thought people were going to fight me on the process.  Sure I knew people were going to think I was nuts, but my journey is not as unique as they may think. Lots of people out there have done the long fast, and lots of people make big changes in their lives during the process.  For me, it is a big change not going to food or fridge when I am stressed or angry or happy or whatever. At very least, that is one thing I am learning about now.  I used to think that I wasn't one of "those people."  I thought I was above such base emotional food issues.  I have realized that removing the food from the equation allows me the distance to read how I feel at any given moment more easily. I have to own the emotion or feeling or situation and not distract myself with taste and swallow.

I saw this most recently at Easter at my sis-in-law's house. The picky foods were out and I could have pinpointed the number of times when I would have reached for them. I noticed the moments of boredom, the lulls in conversation, those moments when my hands wanted something to do, my mouth wanted something to do besides talk.  I can see why people who quit smoking gain weight. They are substituting food for cigs in order to avoid the moments that are uncomfortable or liminal. So what happens when you own your emotions? What is so bad about the moments--or the opposite, what is it about the good moments that make us reach for food?  My guess is that everything in human culture is tied around food, and something deeply ingrained in our DNA, in our most barbaric nature, finds food right up their in importance with family, shelter, and life. Maybe in this modern society, we need to reprogram the very strong connection. Hmmm...

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